According to personal development speaker Brian Tracy, accepting responsibility is one of the most powerful tools for change. If you’re going to change yourself, then you must accept 100% responsibility for your life. You must accept responsibility for everything you say and do, and also every action you take. Most importantly – and this is key – you must accept responsibility for the problem in your life.
The big issue here is that most people do not want to do this. They’d rather blame other people for their issues instead of accepting responsibility. What you have to understand is that this can seriously damage your life. You see, when you blame other people for everything, it takes away your agency.
If you do this, you basically become a helpless victim. Your personal power is given to other people, and without personal power it’s extremely difficult to change your life. Even worse than that, feeling this way can completely destroy your mental health.
If you feel like a victim, or that all your problems are caused by other people, or that you’re helpless against fate, then you’re going to feel absolutely terrible. Your self-esteem and self-confidence will plummet. Not only that, that you’ll probably end up extremely bitter and resentful towards other people. You’ll constantly think about the people who have “wronged” you and obsesses over them. You could end up doing this for years, or even decades of your life, and this could end up completely ruining your life.
Now, there are caveats to this philosophy. For example, if you’ve suffered child abuse or something like that, then it really isn’t your fault. If this is the case, then here’s what you need to understand: while it’s not your fault it’s still your responsibility.
You are the one who is responsible for your life and you are the one who must sort out your issues. No one is going to solve your problems. No one is coming to rescue you. It’s up to you to save yourself.
And this is really the biggest issue with many people. By not accepting responsibility for themselves, they place that responsibility into the hands of other people. They expect other people to help them and do everything for them. The sad truth is that this is completely unrealistic and will never happen.
The bottom line is this: if you’re going to change your life, then you must accept responsibility for your problems. You cannot blame other people or expect other people to help you. Doing this takes away your personal power and your agency.
You become a helpless victim, who is unable to do anything for themselves. If you think like this, it also affects your mental health. You become angry and bitter, and see yourself as someone who has be wronged. You’re unable to do anything for yourself, and cannot see a way out of your problems. The solution to all of this is simply to accept responsibility.