Short Hilarious Random Jokes
Ready for a laugh? I have collected from around the internet some of the funniest random jokes on Homeless. See below 10 side spitting (or not) jokes on homeless.
Homeless Joke 1
“I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile.
The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box.”
Homeless Joke 2
“A man was walking in the city, when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking tramp who asked him for a couple of pounds for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted two quid and asked, “”If I gave you this money, will you take it and buy whisky?””
“”No, I stopped drinking years ago,”” the tramp said.
“”Will you use it to gamble?””
“”I don’t gamble. I need everything I can get just to stay alive.””
“”Will you spend the money on greens fees at a golf course?””
“”Are you MAD? I haven’t played golf in 20 years!””
The man said, “”Well, I’m not going to give you two quid. Instead, I’m going to take you to my home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”” The tramp was astounded.
“”Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty bad.””
The man replied, “”Hey, man, that’s OK! I just want her to see what a man looks like who’s given up drinking, gambling, and golf!”””
Homeless Joke 3
“I’d love to help the homeless people….
I just don’t know where they live.”
Homeless Joke 4
“At the tube station earlier I saw a homeless man sitting on the floor with a three legged dog next to a sign that read: “”Help, I’m starving.””
He can’t be that hungry, he hasn’t even finished his dog.”
Homeless Joke 5
“A homeless guy knocked on my door last night:
“”Excuse me, do you have any spare food?””
“”Yeah, do you mind if it’s yesterday’s dinner?””
“”Not at all.””
“”Come back tomorrow then.”””
Homeless Joke 6
“I’ve just seen a guy lying on a bit of cardboard in a subway, playing a harmonica to earn some money.
It’s nice to see not every one’s out of work because of the recession.”
Homeless Joke 7
“Studies have proven that cats are smarter than dogs.
How many cats do you see sat by a homeless person?”
Homeless Joke 8
“I never give money to homeless people because,
1. They probably make more money than I do.
2. They get to work from home.
3. They drink on the job.”
Homeless Joke 9
Homeless Guy goes to the Doctors, The Doctor examines him and says, ” Here take this three times a day with water”, “What is it?” asks the Homeless Guy, Doctor replies “Soap”
Homeless Joke 10
“A bloke knocked at the door this morning collecting for the homeless.
So I gave him some old cardboard and my daughter’s recorder.”
Jokes on Homeless
Share your best homeless joke below.
Also See: 10 Random Funny Jokes About Holidays – No Woke Jokes Allowed